Which way do I go George?

I'm so confused. Make up your mind. One person says I just think that if you get past your differences and if he can be a good man then you too will be fine. I see the way you to look at each other. You are desend to end up together. YOu just need some work. Others are saying no it's not worth it. It will get better in time. Stay separated. Help. Which way do I go George? Which way do I go? IM so confused.
Okay so what is my heart Saying. My heart says I love bobo. I mourn him when he is not around. The day I left I mourned for 2 months. NOw when I have to let him go again. I mourn all over again. We have great times and we have lousy horrible very bad times. But I can only beg him to go to therapy so much before he gets mad and yells NO. There are always drugs but what kind. I don't want him hurt so he will be nice.
Well, I spend all day practially looking for christmas gifts. I just don't know what to get brian. I know what stuff I need but of course I feel guilty buying for me so I don't buy. But I just can't pin point what he needs. So today he said, I got your Christmas present it is so big. I know I thought I saw it on the microwave. He said I can't wait can I give it to you now. No I like to be surprised. "I hate surprises. I want to give it to you now." He says. No I want you to wrap it in pretty paper and wait to give it to me. Hes like a little kids. Oh yeah B got J a vsmile but forgot to put it in the closet to hide it and J saw it. So he started jumping up and down screaming a vpocket I got a vpocket so B told him Santa sent it in the mail as a early christmas present. I said no it's a birthday present. Since his birthday is closer than christmas. Then I scolded B with a look.

Oh and why am I so confused. B and I are talking again. We are trying not to fight. He gave me my keys back. I do miss him. He is working a lot. Got like 70 hours this week. I don't know how things will end up. But my heart is his. Have to get up at 5 so go. Love you all.