Give me a break, Before I kick your ASS

All I have to say is, HELP! and please dont fart

I just want to run away, but not forever just for an hour or 2. I want some money and to go shopping. Without a baby screaming he is hungry or tired without a 3 years old yelling he wants a new toy. Or I want to walk myself and then darting for the nearst exit. I need an exit door one that leads right out of crazyville. But no there is no break for me. I spend my days at a restaurant where I eat a bite and then chance my 3 years down the isle. Then He sits down I take another bite and give my 9 month old a bite too while doing that my 3 year old books it for new zealand. Then i spend the rest of the meal with him tucked under my arm biting kicking and screaming waiting for the manager to ask us to leave. Take him to play my helpful mother says. Okay so I do that he starts hurting kids. Then all the kids but him get an ice cream. Please can I have ice cream. Of course I say and he races happily to the counter. Before I make it up there a employee explains to me that while she was working he smacked her on the butt. She was quite angry. So we left without the ice cream. i cried all the way home. Not for the lack of ice cream but for the embarrassment I felt. I need a break I scream. Why do I not get a girls night out? My husband pretends to be at work and instead is drinking with the guys for 6 hours and he does this 3 days a week and me Im at home cleaning cooking and everything. Plus defending myself from the terrible 3s. Is it too early to retire. Why do I have the only kid who never sits down sleeps just 4 hours a night and is so mean. I cant even hang out with anyone because I spend most of the evening Protecting other people for the horrible creature I call my son. Should a mother seriously not like her son. I love my son but he is out of control. And im with him 24/7.

Now it's soon going to get worse. I accepted a commission job of $600 a closing. Of course I dont know where I will store my kids while I go on 3-6 appointments a day. Thats about 80 meetings a week. If I close 12/80 appointments I will make about 9700 for the month. This I really need. If they were small enough I could pack them in my purse with my makeup and take them alone. NO possible. Most guys dont even have to worry about. If they have to go to work they know my wife is responsible for the babysitter.

You know I thought there was a system where a mother could find relief. But I cant even get help with daycare. I still dont know where my kids will go. I may have to turn this job down. Mom says get a daycare. We know that wont happen. I advertised for a week got a few calls and was told $50 a week is too much. This sucks. I dont know what IM going to do but I need money quick and there just isnt any. Give me a break would ya. the lottery misterious cash on my front porch. Bring on the money. :(

We took a family trip to the zoo. the kids had fun. So I am including some pictures.

We went to see the dolphins. We all got wet but the baby got soaked. He gaves us a frawn and then started to cry. It's was quite fun.

love ya.

Well i was looking through pictures and found some cool ones. sorry I dont have any new ones.

Times have been hard. I wish I had my own place. Been trying though. Glad to hear sis got money. Use it wisely. Got my school grant I got 3580.00 for the year. I am excited. this is my last year and I will have my Business Administration in Financial Services. I got my Accounting TC by the way. Certificate came a week or two ago. I almost cried. Bri my husband wasn't impressed. He said he will not celebrate until I am out of school completely. But I was happy. Wanted to tell everyone but they were all on vacation. I really miss my sisters. I was thinking about moving there but I know there will be some hassile in it all. Too many lawyers and lots of fights. dont know where i am moving yet. Looking for place though.

Signed up for a few classes. i will have only 1-2 in the Spring. Then I am done. I'll plan to invite everyone to my graduation May 2008. Okay so remember your invited. So come see me graduate. I am going to start a daycare in my new house. Need the money and great for the kids. See you soon mel